I’m feeling oddly upbeat.
Regardless of the fact that I burned my thumb quite badly while making icing last night with 445 degree chocolate Nutella-y bad/goodness, regardless of the fact that the lady I’ll be doing a mural for hasn’t gotten back to me yet, regardless of the fact that I have about $3.28 in my bank account right now, regardless of the fact that tomorrow involves epic gardening (at a house not my own), regardless of the fact that Jayne is in heat AND seems to have forgotten what the litterbox is for, regardless of the fact that alone time with Sean has been reduced to sleeping… I could go on, but…
I’ve opened the window and can hear light rainfall, birds, churchbells, traffic through rain, and a plane going past overhead.
I’ve gotten two Craigslist responses, and sent out about seven enquiring emails through Craigslist.
Providing a background check goes smoothly (lulz, rite?) I will be writing horror articles on Examiner.com.
I’ll be going to New York Monday night with Sean so he can move things for his uncle (great-uncle? I’m unsure), who will be giving him vast quantities of old movies, books, and gay porn (because Sean’s life is reminiscent of a sitcom).
My parents will be for real sending their tax info, so I can for real fix my financial aid situation.
I took the day for myself. I did a few dishes before the warm water began hurting my thumb, then came upstairs to write and surf silly YouTube Twilight parodies.
So upbeat.
My mom is truly talented. Just when things are going along nicely, she has the ability to say something that makes me want to vomit and punch things at the same time.
(The following is an excerpt from a bit of chat that she, through my younger brother, was having with my older brother. I can assure you that the rest of the chat was just as bad, but it involved personal issues with my older brother. She asked my little brother to send me a copy.)
10:52 PM Billy: When does she move in with sean? (is typing for mom)
10:53 PM David: She’s not moving in with Sean.
10:54 PM Billy: (Mom) Yea right, and i just heard they had thier 6th month anniverary
David:
They did in fact. They’ve been dating for six months. Sean, however, is
against commitment while they’re in school, because that’s unstable.
They’re not going to move in together.10:55 PM Billy: (Mom) they will just sleep together? thats bogus, at least Sean gets what he wants
…
It may just be me, but WHAT THE FUCK? Not only are you essentially calling me a whore, but you’re calling Sean (I don’t even care, something damn awful that couldn’t be used to reference Sean EVER, and I’m not saying this because I’m biased but because it’s true.) which is even worse. To top it all off, you’re doubting my judgment skills?
I can’t even type what I’m thinking properly STILL, and this was sent to me over an hour ago. If there was ever any doubt, my mother is completely evil. Just saying. She can seem nice sometimes, or pathetic, but mostly…This is damn near unforgivable. It’s given me a super headache. You know, I almost think, ‘Sara, you’re overreacting’, but then I reread something and realize ‘not so much.’.
This is definitely not appropriate behavior for a mother to have towards her children.
I almost think that she’s jealous or otherwise upset that I’m having a good life now.
And you know what? The reason I haven’t talked about sex with my mom, aside from the fact that it’s embarrassing, is because it’s a private thing. So somehow she deduced from that that I am being used or whatever. Fuck. Off. That is SUCH an incomprehensible thought. I get that she doesn’t know Sean very well, but that DOESN’T MATTER. It’s a serious conviction to put on someone.
And you know what, Mom? We have awesome sex. And if I choose to move in with him, I will. And marriage? If we want to do that, we will. And none of it would be because you told me to, or not to (She is oh so strongly opposed to marriage), but because it’s something we want to do.
But for now, I’m perfectly happy with the way things are. So I’ll be angry about this for a while, but then I’ll move on. And know what? So not staying at the ‘rents house when we visit, if there was any indication otherwise. You know, being used in a hotel room is much more appropriate than in your parents’ spare room.
And I want people to know that David was perfectly right in saying that Sean is super nice and remarkably sweet. I can’t think of any instance where he was angry with me, even when I was being annoying or moody to the point that I, were i another person, would have been frustrated with me. He got me awesome chocolate for Valentine’s Day, and took me to see Friday the 13th for our six month thing, and he’s taking me to see Blue October just because. For Christ’s sake, he calls me SarBear.
I think I’m getting sick. My throat hurts, my head hurts, and, to top it all off, my belly’s cramped from girliness. The Powers That Be should advance into the 21st century. Buy an iPhone or something! Things would be so much more humane if we just got a text that was like, ‘ur not preggers kthnxbai’ or, conversely, ‘ur preggo!1! roflersk8s.’
Anyhow… yeah. I talked to my mom for like five hours the other day and didn’t feel like killing myself afterwards. Maybe distance does help familial relationships.
I’ve actually been very happy lately; things have been awesome. Maybe that’s why I’m sickly: things are too awesome, and TPTB are like ‘Whoa, Sara! You haven’t been upset lately! *Whaaam!* You are now cursed by a flu! And, alas, no Sudafed! Mwahahahaha!’
Sean and I have been dating for half a year on the 13th. Which is a Friday. Dun dun DUN! That’s neat. We’ll probably go see the remake of Friday the Thirteenth, even though it’s a Micheal Bay film. It’s got Sammy. Not necessarily to celebrate or anything, neither of us are surprised. We would have gone to see it anyway.
School’s been neat; 83% in psychology, 97% in sociology.
I just got a new book today, a YA book called ‘Masquerade’, book two in the Blue Bloods series. I liked the first on well enough.
Twilight… I figure I’ll get my current opinion out there. I like it. I’m not jumping on the bandwagon here, I’ve like it from the beginning. I’ve come to the conclusion that it was a decent book, but not worth the uproar it’s caused. It’s got okay writing, an okay, somewhat original story, but it isn’t as obsession-worthy as people are making it out to be. I’m starting to hate most of the fans, which isn’t a good sign.
Also, the following books of the series weren’t very good at all… I was kind of ignoring the flaws before, I think. Breaking Dawn in particular was awful.
I’ll give her props for The Host, though; I liked it quite a lot.
Sean is off visiting his brother at his frat. I hope he’ll be continually safe and smart. I’m not overly concerned; he’s a good person. His brother is trying to convince him to join the frat. You can’t see me, but I’m wrinkling my nose. I mean, if that’s what he wants to do, he can go for it… just… ew. It doesn’t seem appealing at all to me. And also he’d have to live on campus, at the frat… which means that we wouldn’t be able to spend much if any time together. Sadness.
And he’s scheduled to hang out with his imaginary friend Brandon tomorrow. Day after that is silly gaming stuff, so we’ll see each other, but we won’t be hanging out, and Monday I have to babysit. Therefore, I can’t properly hang with him until either Monday night or Tuesday during the day. This is me being emo and whiny.
I got kind of prettied up today when we went to the mall, in that I was wearing decent clothes and makeup, and I was helping watch Tina. People kept giving me funny looks. I think they thought that I was a teenage mother. Or maybe they thought, ‘Hey, that girl is kind of good-looking and is looking at stuff in the comic-book store!’. That reaction is always fun. Sometimes I provoke it intentionally.
So, for psychology class we had to find a problem in America and use problem solving techniques to solve the problem theoretically. Here is my attempt to solve the problem of illegal gay marriage:
Gay marriage is still illegal in many states.
-So what?
So it is prohibiting people from being happy, which is a violation of the constitution.
-Why?s
*Why is it such a problem with people that people want to marry to the same sex?
Because it violates their religion.
*Why are they bringing religion into it?
Um… good question… Because it is a stable rule system?
*Why are they only paying attention to part of that rule system?
… again, I’m baffled… They’re picking the parts that they want to follow?
*Why is it considered at all, then?
… Ask them.
As you can see, I failed. I have to find a more solvable problem…
I have the taste of hot tea on my tongue, bizarre, whimsical thoughts in my brainpan, and a new(ish) Lappy to help me through it.
That’s write; I’m now able to share these things with you, gentle (not genital)-readers.
I burned my tongue. But it was worth it; this is probably the best tea I’ve ever made. It’s just black tea, with just sugar, but it has the perfect tea:water:Sugar Raytio.
If Sean were in a real boyband, I think things would be okay. He may bring the style back yet, rocking out to Rock Band with the microphone headset and hip gyrations that could easily be synchronized.
Blink 182 thinks that Aliens Exist, and Jenny Was a Friend of The Killers. Also, ♪♫Nobody likes you,
Everyone left you,
They’re all out without you
Havin’ fun. ♫♪
And Cake Ain’t No Good.
(My last.fm makes me happy. )
I should really be DOING things, like cleaning, or laundry, or finishing psych/soc reading but I’m in one of those rare (medium, well-done) moods where I just want to do something not necessarily productive, but resulting in a product nonetheless. Also, there’s time for it all.
I’ve missed SPN for two weeks in a row and am very upset by it. I can have neither Sam nor Dean. Neither can Sean (who would totally pee in Jensen’s bum if given the opportunity, regardless of what he may say.).
I think I may, under a penname, begin to write ridiculous erotica, but pass it off as serious business. People read the stuff on the shelves, which is ridiculous enough as it is, so why not? There’s a simple method, as Mena, Sean and I were discussing the other day:
1. Stubborn female lead.
2. Annoying, ‘always right’, handsome, headstrong male lead whom the lead female would never talk to of her own volition.
3. An unpleasant circumstance (i.e. being trapped in a cabin together in a snowstorm, being holed up in a vault for days at a bank heist, etc.)
4. Female realizing the super sexual tension.
5. Male says something like, “Why don’t you just do what you want to do?” with sexual undertones.
6. Female is indignant and blushes. ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’
7. Smexy fun time ensues.
8. Now, one of several denouements:
A. Male lead is arrogant and stupid, so female leaves wondering what she had been thinking.
B. Female uncovers a sensitive side of male and they stay together forever.
C. Someone, or both of them, die.
*You get bonus points if, in the story, you add fangs, werewolves, the words ‘throbbing, member, irresistable, desire,’ etc., set it in a historical setting, a futuristic setting, an alternate present setting, a European setting, add fantasy elements, or any combination of the above.
It’s so simple, it practically writes itself. Like a Tom Clancy novel or something.
Well, I’ll let you get back to fighting dragons. (Literal dragons. That’s what I like to imagine you’re doing. Metaphorical dragons are less fun to picture; then you realize what crappy things are going on out there.)
without the fancy outfit. I think I’m okay with that, though.
So, the other day, Sean hosted a Requiem game, and nearly 30 people showed up, and he only knew two of them. It was apparently very weird.
Well, somebody left a lozenge on the floor in the kitties’ room.
The black kitty (pausing to note that he was the fattest) tried to eat it.
Kitty throats aren’t big enough to swallow lozenges, and he started choking.
Sean heard noises and went to check it out, and saw Blackie choking. He tried to help him, but, since the kitty was scared, he wouldn’t let him near him very easily and made it really hard to do. After a few minutes of struggling, Blackie stopped moving and his heart wasn’t beating.
Sean got the lozenge out, but Blackie still wasn’t breathing, so he did kitty mouth-to-mouth CPR stuff and resuscitated him.
Blackie was okay for a while, alive and walking around, anyway, and seemed okay. Unfortunately, he died the next day, asumingly from inside badness. It was horrible. Not to mention, Sean felt irrationally bad about it.
That happened a while ago, though. We’ve since given away all of the kittens but Rocco, and of course Jayne, the mommy kitty.
So, recently… not a lot has been going down. Sean’s still a superhero, which is why I haven’t changed the title.
My Lappy went kerplooey and apparently didn’t post this a while ago, which is why it’s late.
Oh, I won at ZOMBIE! Ninja Hunt. I’m so stealth.
So, this whole election thing is ridiculous. People are being stupid about it. It’s great that they have opinions, but they’re just being… stupid about it. Seriously, people are tired of other countries and their opinions of Americans, but then they go and do things like shooting a baby bear in the head and plastering it with Obama signs, or hanging a Sarah Palin mannequin and making a McCain mannequin seem to be on fire. It’s just… stupid. I mean, it may be a little bit funny at first, but then you realise that it isn’t, that you are talking about real people who have to live with this shit.
I don’t want to hear any more Obama threats. I mean, seriously, if you backwater hillbillies really think that strongly about a black president just because he’s black… Well, okay, I dunno what you should do instead, but don’t do that.
Now, I’m all for Obama being elected, and I don’t like McCain or Palin, but, that having been said, I wouldn’t threaten their lives. That’s absurd. It just doesn’t seem logical to me.
So, went to DelCo, it seems neat enough. Well, as neat as something even vaguely resembling high school could. $75 for my GED; it’s quite a bit, but I think it’ll be okay. I’m going to try to pay David back once I get a job.
So job possibilities (some based on lists online, some suggested, all of them real.):
1.) Applebee’s. Apparently, I’d make a killing in tips.
2.) Starbuck’s. Can we say discount? Cause, you know, I can.
3.) A used book store. Less annoying people than, say, a Barnes & Noble.
4.) Barnes & Noble. Annoying people, but, you know.
5.) Grocery store clerk. Pretty common for people my age, and annoying people, but the monotony could tone that down a bit.
6.) WaWa employee. See above re: monotony.
7.) Ninja. It could happen. I mean, I wouldn’t be able to tell you guys, and I’d probably have to stop blogging completely, but that is a sacrifice I’d be willing to make. I dunno about the pay, though…
8.) Children’s tv show host. Actually, maybe not so much. I might decide to use my powers for evil. It would be too tempting. (Possible segment titles: ‘Fun Four-letter Words to Know and Tell!’, ‘Curious George and the Electric Fence!’, ‘Daddy Drinks Because You Cry!’)
9.) Dental assistant. No, nevermind. I don’t want to hold the spitting cup. Thanks anyway.
10.) Dance instructor. Ha. Haha. ‘Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion.’
11.) Duty manager. Haha, ‘Duty’. That’s awesome. (Obviously not one of those.)
This will go on. I need to venture into the work force hypothetically before I do it physically.
So, even though I’m eighteen and technically an adult, I hadn’t felt like one until recently.
I need to get my liscense, get a job, go to school, get a better job, start paying rent, deal with student loans, get a car, get a place of my own… and that’s just in the next few years.
It seems incredibly overbearing. I mean, I know that it’s not that bad, and I’ve got people to support me, and that it’s normal for peole to grow up… but I still feel like a kid. I don’t really trust myself to take on these responsibilities.
On another, less whiny note, NaNo is almost upon us. I’m thinking of writing about Creepers, which I won’t elaborate on because it is two in the morning and they scare the bejesus out of me. I’m hoping to get at least 20k this year. I’m going to try, anyway.
It’s silly; I miss Sean, even though I saw him yesterday. Le sigh.
It’s getting much, much colder, and with the change in weather comes a change in baby Tina: Princessdom.
Let her eat cake!
Ooh, the trip to Ohio went surprisingly well. Everyone loved Sean, the ride din’t seem too long at all, we stayed in budget, even though we weren’t near any Exxon-Mobil stations. Sean’s pumpkin’s cruise control makes for great gas mileage. I got most of my stuff; both of my parents cried.
The haunted house that we went to was silly; I mean, I had fun, but I wasn’t scared or even really surprised, unlike some people I was walking with who shall remain unnamed. The ride home, however, was horrifying. We were in the middle of Deliverance County Ohio, in a little city called Bumblefuck. Turns out, there was an unexpected road closure that resulted in a detour that wasn’t shown. Even the GPS was like, ‘Wtf?’.
We brought back Jayne! And her kittens! Sean now has an Itty Bitty Kitty Committee at his house. They all love him. Jayne adores him, which is weird, because she wasn’t really lovable to anyone but me. Now she’s all full of love. I don’t think that it was because of the kittens; she was still pissy toward the parentals while she was there.
I think I may be a vampire Disney Princess for Halloween. I may have actually said that already… I dunno.
I should probably sleep; much cleaning/unpacking tomorrow. I’ve been kind of avoiding it by hanging out with Sean.
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